Gigi Thomure – A Smelting Pot in the Year 2000
Gigi Thomure – A Smelting Pot in the Year 2000
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This transcript is from a presentation by Gigi Thomure at The Third Annual Ritual Abuse, Secretive Organizations and Mind Control Conference, August 4 – 6, 2000 at the DoubleTree Hotel in Windsor Locks, CT. Some of the topics discussed may be triggering. The conference is educational and not intended as therapy or treatment. All accusations are alleged. Our providing the information below does not necessarily constitute our endorsement of it.
Gigi Thomure will be speaking today from 10:30-11:30. Some of the topics discussed may be triggering. The conference is educational and not intended as therapy or treatment. Photographing, audiotaping and videotaping without written permission from S.M.A.R.T. are prohibited. Audiotapes will be available of all speakers. Please remember that this presentation is being recorded. Anything you say will be recorded. Thank you for coming to Gigi’s presentation.
Gigi Thomure is a survivor of ritual abuse, SRA and mind control programs ranging from alleged Masonic to military programming. Her programming includes many areas of New World Order and top-secret global planning. She has found many timed programs and she is finding ways to carefully use this information for the protection of others. The title of her presentation is “A Smelting Pot in the Year 2000.”
Good morning!
First, I want to start off by saying my roommate is going to be helping me with time, so if you see her doing things, she’s not trying to trigger me or anybody else, or gesture me or anything. She’s just helping me keep time. Also, I want to start out by saying any gesture I might make, or facial expressions, or anything else, is just me. No one in my system has any intent, any desire or any interest in triggering anyone. I want to get that out of the way first.
Also, I am still in therapy. I’ve been in therapy for ten years so far. I’m still at a discovery process with a lot of this programming, but I’m also recovering. I get a piece, go through that, then new things come up and it’s just a lovely journey…I’m sure you all can share that! (laughter) No drawings, no forms, I do stick figures, so what’s the point. I use music a lot, but that’s because music was used a lot on me. My grandmother started teaching me piano at three; she was a concert pianist. She knew a lot of big names, like Gershwin, Liberace, stuff like that, some of those types of people.
The first thing I want to say is I think any kind of abuse is horrendous…any kind. But when you get into RA, SRA, mind control, it’s beyond words. It’s done deliberately; it’s evil. I also want to remind people that my presentation is not a ‘6,’ it’s a ‘9’–just to prepare you for that.
I hate validation. In my language, that is a four-letter word: VALIDATION. So I won’t be using the word ‘alleged’ a whole lot. I’ve been very, very lucky in my recovery from the beginning. Annie gave most of my talk, so this may be short!
From the very beginning of my recovery I was so lucky. I had slide shows in my head. The day I turned thirty, I had lunch with my father. My father wanted to have dinner with me, but that was too much time with him, and I didn’t want to have it. So I had lunch with him, and then the slide show started. It was going so rapidly, that I couldn’t get hold of anything. The first thing that came to me was incest by my father, then by some other relatives, then by some neighbors and then by strangers. I was at an in-patient place, where I grew up in Kansas City, Missouri, for incest survivors. They were a place that did not believe in MPD; they do now! They ruled out everything they could for me. The only thing they could figure out was MPD/DID. They then sent me to a hospital in Colorado called Columbine, which has a lot of meaning lately, which was then known as the National Center for Dissociative Disorders and Ritual Abuse. So it was kind of an odd stay. What happened was, I had no money, I had insurance to cover thirty days in there. Their average stay was two to three months. So for me to be able to get treatment, I needed to go on Medicare. I needed to go on disability to get treatment. As the treatment went on, I couldn’t have worked anyway. It’s a sad thing that to get treatment you have to go on disability. It was also, in retrospect, I see that this was really a bad move, because for me to stay there it was an exchange program. One of my alters taught Walter Young about the occult, so it was a very strange experience, the way it worked out. But I did get a lot of work done. I spent the entire year that I turned thirty-three at this hospital. It was for safety. When I first started remembering things I had no idea. I would go in with my therapist there, at the sexual/incest survivor place, and come out, and get into a game right away. My therapist would be like tearing her hair out, saying, “My God, she just told me the most horrendous stuff, and here she is laughing with everybody.” And I wondered, “Why is everybody on the staff looking at me like that?” I wanted to be crazy. I wanted to be given a pill that I could take every day for the rest of my life and all of this would just be in my head, it’d just be some chemical, some weird, weird chemical imbalance. But, I wanted that, total; I still do. I’d be happy. I still do…
The group that my family’s involved in, as Neil said, my first bio was kind of heavy…I’m a seventh generation member of a matriarchal occult and Illuminati family. When I was born, this was like seventh generation, the year 2000, the Messiah person in my family. It was always the second child who was the ‘chosen’ one and being female was an extreme plus.
My bloodline is a culmination of a lot of interesting things. I’m about 96% German. I have on my mother’s side…who waited until…my grandmother’s 98 and she’s in the hospital dying, so…she had fifteen brothers and sisters. It was after all of them were dead that she finally said, “OK, I can tell you now. We’re Jewish.” I’ve known other people who’ve had lox and stuff at times just for the heck of it, or use Yiddish words, so we kind of figured that, but no one would admit. Finally she said, “Yeah, we’re Jewish.” She told me a whole lot that I already knew about Cabal, so I have that on one side. I have a lot of Germanian pagan lore and beliefs and Nordic beliefs on the other side of my family. My mom went into labor on the night of September 7, 1957, I was born at 3:33 on September 8, I was raised Catholic. At that time, September 8 was celebrated as the Virgin Mary’s birthday, so you’ll have to excuse me if it doesn’t view on tape. I’m sorry about this, but I have always throughout my life been known as the ultimate f*ck of God because of the 7th being the marriage of the Beast and then the Blessed Virgin’s birth that day.
When I was a child…a lot of things Annie used, I know also. Dr. Mengele came and set up our home so that we were not only constantly monitored, but also constantly having the input of pulses, tones. Certain kinds of moves I would make would get certain responses. When I was three, I remember my father sitting me on his lap smacking me and smacking me and smacking me. That was called the ‘get tough’ game. By the time we were eight, we could be electrocuted and not move, not move a muscle. That’s how much control we had learned. So, if I appear kind of flat, when I talk about some of these things, I’m still working real hard to get over that control, of constantly looking like ‘yeah, I have my stuff together.’
Internally, I have what I call, now, geo-cities. I quit counting alters after about 200 and something, and now there are different geo-cities and we just click on to whatever we need to work on at that time.
Dr. Delgado was one of my main handlers. He was often at our house checking on us. We made trips to… I was…I don’t know what I was. All of these abuses, I first experienced, I second supervised, I third trained. I’m not proud of that, but I know that was not my fault and that ‘s a great relief. To be in a position of supervising really put a lot of guilt on me when I found that part out.
The way we were brought up was…our concept of…I went to a Catholic school. Almost every teacher I had was in our group. The monsignor of the church wore the same outfit both places, black with purple. It was hard for me to distinguish what was what. I wasn’t allowed to go to friends’ houses until I was in about the sixth grade and when I did, I knew they were putting on an act. I knew that when I left the same stuff that happened to me was going to happen to them. So as far as telling anybody…I didn’t know it was abnormal. I never knew it was abnormal.
I believe that I was split at birth, actually in the womb. I do have pieces of my core scattered everywhere, with also cloned cores. So it’s hard to get to that core, but we’re working on it, because otherwise I feel like I have a hole in my heart and I want that filled. Everything they taught us (and this is the part that is hardest for us…and now I’m talking collectively–us) is to unwind the good and the evil because they were so intertwined it’s hard to unravel. And then you get to a knot, which is usually a memory, and then you have to undo it. So I’m still learning what’s normal. And I’ve even got a book called “Ten Rules of Being Human,” because I don’t know, I still don’t know sometimes. The only way I know is by people’s expressions. If I say something and they’re like (shrug/questioning), I go, “What?” So a lot of things still have to be explained to me.
A lot of things I said in my original bio are that I’ve been trained by people such as Jose Delgado, Dr. Greenbaum. I did visit Cameron. I spent a lot of time in Quebec, not being a part of anything but watching. I was very young to be watching those things, to be seeing what they were doing. Another thing I want to say is I don’t believe all the FBI are bad. I happen to know three agents and they’re absolutely wonderful. But, they brought a lot of that dirty V… word back to me–validation. I went in and just was like, “OK, I’m crazy. What’s come into my head? Here’s some pictures. Here’s some names.” Every one of them checked out. She came back and said, “Well, we went to where your dad’s family is; we flew over the compound.” And I was like, “Compound?” What happened was my grandfather had bought this huge piece of property south of St. Louis, Missouri, and all of them had built their houses around it. You could not access it; it was all private drives. I remember playing volleyball on the Fourth of July there. I also remember a lot of other stuff at night, going on in that field.
Some of the things that were done to me were…the physical abuse was horrible, but I have to say that was probably the least of my abuse. I think the psychological, emotional and mental were so much worse. It damaged my spirit so much. There was one time…and these people have the money to be creative, let me tell you. I took a trip to hell one time and Jesus and Lucifer were both there and they were brothers. They were joking around; they were having a fine old time. We went through room after room after room of so-called sinners and found out they were having a fine time. Actually, there were quite a few people that we considered the good people there too. At the very end of this, walking through this smoky, bizarre place, Lucifer was crucifying Jesus upside-down. And then we walked out. After we were walked out about fifteen minutes later, Jesus appeared again, and walked out and shook hands and said, “Hey that was a good time!” So my concept of God was totally screwed up. God and Lucifer were equal, they were brothers, they were the same, they both had the same desire. You never used the word ‘Satan’ because that wasn’t a name. It was a word for adversary. We named Lucifer “The Light in the Darkness” and he was always beautiful, very appealing. Going to a Catholic school, I constantly heard “God is Father.” I didn’t like God at all. I couldn’t. To this day, I cannot refer to God as Father. “Creator,” yes, that’s fine. “Mother,” yes, but not “Father.”
I had a group of friends in Columbine and we all kind of stuck together. A lot of us moved out to Colorado just to keep the therapist. My therapist ended up being one of those lovely NLS people. I found out afterwards, “I cannot work with this man.” It took me a few years to realize why, but it’s that mimicking thing that they do, that I can’t, I just can’t…it wasn’t helping. Reflecting myself back to me…I already knew what I knew. I needed help with something new…the way to live.
Sidney Gottlieb was also a good friend; he used to come around quite often. I believe Michael A. was very much a part of our lives for those that know him…I knew him. Last night, some people were talking about him and hearing him called ‘Colonel’ really freaked me out because it’s like, “No, it’s just Michael. …with the weird eyebrows. OK?” He did a lot of work with us and much of the time he was there he was stationed in St. Louis and used to use cargo planes to take me in and out of the country. We spent a lot of time in Germany; a lot of time in concentration camps. A lot of time at a place called Wewelburg Castle, don’t know if people know about that. I think it was one of the SS’s big hangouts. I sat at the round table; I had my name in gold on the chair behind me. You know, I traveled a lot. How did I do it? The Catholic school, they were all in it. I was never absent. I was never there, but I was never absent. I did a lot of travelling. I’m sorry, I’m going to be switching a lot. There are a lot of people that want to talk, that want to talk fast, soooo… In the states, I have a lot of military programming. We have our own farm in the states. Actually, we have a couple of farms in the states on the East Coast here, not too far from here, where I was taught a lovely game called “Hunt Or Be Hunted.” We dressed up in fatigues, we took our little rifles and some of us would be on platforms and some of us would be in the woods and probably by the time I was seven I was in a control tower directing helicopters and troops. Right now, my rank is General. I don’t know if that means anything to you; it didn’t to me for a long time. Although I was getting mail to “General Thomure” and that was a trigger “remember your place, remember how important you are and remember to come back.”
Lately I’ve discovered a lot of Monarch programming, where the cocoons have opened, the butterflies have faces and it’s time for them to go home. And personally for home, we would like to go home (up there), but that’s not where we’re supposed to go, we’re supposed to go meet our handlers. We’re supposed to meet people that we had handled. But please take all of this however you want, believe what you want, do whatever you want. A lot of this still, this right here still, I have too much validation for.
Some of the things going on presently…I’m not going to talk a lot about my abuse because it doesn’t matter to a point…we’ve all experienced it and it doesn’t matter how bad it is. It’s done its job, so I won’t go into that too much at all.
I will say at the age of thirteen, since it was so important in our family to have a second child, I was impregnated by my father. I had a little boy named Christopher; they called him “Jesus.” He was born Christmas night 1970. He lived 17 days. We were taken there every night. If we were at school, we were taken there after school to nurse, to bond. On the night of January 13th they said, “We’re going to have a big party.” They didn’t call him “Jesus” anymore, they called him Christopher and I thought, “Oh, they’ve finally accepted it. We’re going to have a party for Christopher tonight.” It was like, “Oh, I get to bring him home, I get to bring him home.” You never knew. I actually kind of, I’ll give you the picture: two altars .It was very fortunate that night that I had (have) such a brave and loving alter. Actually it was the mother of Christopher, her name was “Mary,” convenient enough, and this all took place in a stable–in a cave. Missouri is just about built on caves, so there’s very easy access…nobody much knows what’s going on and there’ll be business buildings right on top of you. The alter “Mary” that night fought and fought like hell. She took the little knife off the altar and began saying, “Anybody who comes near me is going to get it.” That was how I felt. I was close to a censer, and what I believe they did was throw some belladonna on it and started getting the smoke my way, because I know things started getting really fuzzy. In the struggle to get the knife someone had put it through our leg. One of the things that we are not allowed is to mark ourselves, or to be marked in any way. A couple of reasons. One is just to keep the body pure and another is people are going to notice me like that. Electricity and deprivation stuff doesn’t show up so I had a lot of that.
When I was in therapy I was watched…at one time I had four therapists. One was for group therapy, one was a male (the original therapist I’d started with), the second one was a female (so I would have good role models of both sexes), and the fourth one was one I’d met in the hospital. My little ones took to her like she was ‘mama,’ and the therapist let them call her ‘Mom.’ They got to a point where an alter I had named ‘Eric’ said if you spell it backwards the way he spells it is ‘Eiryk’ He corrected us several times and said, “If you’re going to talk about me, please spell my name right.” And we looked at it and, “Oh…Kyrie” We have another one called ‘The Great One.’ I was at the hospital in Texas at the McGazie Institute and the therapist said, “I am not going to call you ‘The Great One.'” And he said, “Fine. You can call me ‘Gross Ein.'” And the therapist said, “OK.” In German, that means “The Great One.”
When I was in the hospital the very first time I got a lot of calls. They were going to kidnap me to show that they were around. And they weren’t going to hurt me; they just wanted to prove their point. My mother started getting phone calls. My therapist got phone calls. One of them had somebody drive by and take pictures of her children and it was not really a surprise when we had this major meeting and most of them said, “We can’t do it.” One of them was the ‘Mom’ therapist though, and that pretty much, almost put us back in. And people spoke to us about emotional boundaries and stuff and how she’d obviously crossed it and it didn’t mean to hurt any of us. They still wanted ‘Mom.’ And she did hurt us.
In my therapy, I have a little bit different things. My gammas give disinformation and they abound; I have three sets of Greek alters: gammas, omegas–not omegas, we don’t have omegas; sometimes I wish we did–deltas and thetas. Most of my work growing up until really not that long ago, a number of years ago, had been in remote viewing–in Bluebird, Blue Streak. And now it’s really cool cause we’re so excited because we have people sending us pictures of bad people and we tell them where they are. We’ve found children in military installations, gotten them out because somebody believed us, and they went, looked and got them out. We found a lot of perpetrators that were hiding and got them. We’re still doing that. And that part, I love. I want to say, “Hey, you suckers taught me! Good job!” I’m just taking what I learned and turning it right back around. They want me to shut up really bad. I talked last year a little bit about, when the panel was up here…”What do you do when helicopters come by?” They gave me great ideas…”Well, what about a flare gun.” I really can’t do that, but we did talk quite a bit about taking the big flashlights out just to get the reflections of some kind of metal. Because neighbors were coming up…”What is that?” “I don’t know. I have no idea. I see nothing. I know nothing.”
There is a group of us from Columbine that became family to each other–there were eight of us. Right now there’s two; six of them have committed suicide. So connecting–big time bad–very hard. I can get so close that I can’t do it all the way. I’m learning; I’m getting a lot better. Actually right before I came down here I got a call from somebody I am in love with, she told me good luck, and that she loved me and I felt it. And it feels good. For those that are working on feelings, know that love is right up there.
MKUltra was a big part of it, Monarch programming, Blue Bird, Operation Often; I could go on and on with projects that I was privy to. My physical abuse had to be very small. There was no reason to extend it after you could be electrocuted and not move. There’s no reason to go past that. We had a lot of Navy SEALS involved. We spent time at a number of military bases, some that were just known as ‘the North farm,’ ‘ the South farm,’ ‘the White House’–places like that. I’ve had someone who is trained to train cops to learn about this stuff, to recognize stuff, and he’s often one who sends me pictures of roads. He’ll say, “What is this?” and I’ll say, “This is on the way to here.” “What’s in this garage?” “It’s a secret stairway right there.” There are so many underground installations around this country–it’s sickening. They’re all, not all, a lot of them are being closed down, a lot of them are being discovered. But the rest of them are being used still for training children, bringing children in from the different countries. One of my main abusers I just finally somebody had said his name…his name was “Harry Coe” The very day we talked about him in therapy, somebody sent me an e-mail from the St. Petersburg FL paper that showed that he had committed suicide that day. Talk about freak-out; talk about that dirty ‘V’ word. And I know it wasn’t a suicide; everybody knows it wasn’t a suicide.
One of the things I really want to talk about is programming. If people have Monarch programming, please get to it NOW. Make that a priority NOW. Don’t let the butterflies go home in whichever aspect that is–if it’s to go to a place, a person, or to be dead, whichever, work on those now.
Another one of the programmings is — I don’t watch TV that much because I cannot take it any more. It’s just like ‘how blatant can we be.’ There’s a certain news channel named after an animal (I won’t mention the name, small animal, red looking), that started it off with “X-files, then “Millenium,” then “Brimstone,” and I’m sorry I’ve forgot the latest one. Don’t forget, “Nowhere Man.” TV is making us so insensitive right now. They’re abusing, desensitizing us so much that we just float right along with it. And it doesn’t even matter if it’s not believable; it’s just fun. Big deal. People who have UFO experiences…. Well, I don’t think I have UFO experiences–I know that they’re people dressed up–but it just kind of makes that bigger and more a part of our world.
A big chunk of programming was the Y2K bug, and it bit every person in the world. It was the biggest piece of propaganda in world history where we sat at our TVs prepared as survivors. It taught us how to be survivors; it taught us how to stock up. And we watched from one corner of the world to the next one, all the way around. First of all the celebration, secondly, the more important one, “did they make it?” Country by country by county by continent by continent. Their coverage made us global. So now what’s next? The New World Order, the Global Courts, the International Criminal Court System. They had a big conference at the Hague last year that I was just totally against anyone going to. And then we decided if anybody was going to go, let me go. But I didn’t have the money and I think I’m glad I didn’t go cause I would have wanted to confront a lot of people. “What do you really mean by that?” But we have all these peace movements set up. We’re in such a relaxed position right now that those of us who realize that midnight is midnight on say Saturday night, and 12:01 is the next day. The millenium hasn’t started yet; it starts in 2001. And we are so soaked and so prepared and so pliable that it’s gonna go by and we’re not even gonna notice.
I’ll say something a lot stronger on this. There’s an alleged computer in Belgium named Big Bertha. Every bank in the world is hooked up to this computer. That’s what being Y2K compliant meant. You’ll notice that more and more we’re talking about being a cashless society. That’s not to keep us safe, that’s to keep us under control, and it very well may. From about June until November there are going to be major programs going off and I don’t really want to name names because I don’t want to put anything in people’s heads that’s not there. I just want you to have this information and keep it in the back of your head. If you have a therapist, start talking to him about this. If you have alters inside that know anything, ask them about Christmas. Christmas is going to be a huge day. One thing that’s going to make it very special is…probably most of you know that most of the planet alignments and the things that have been going on this year, the lunar eclipses, the solar eclipses…Christmas Day we’re having for North America a total solar eclipse. So that’s going to out-shadow what the day means and there’s going to be a lot of things happening that day—the end of 2000, the beginning of 2001. For us, for my family, this is actually the year 3 because in 1999, it was 6661, so now every year we go, we take the 2 and add whatever number’s after it. This is the year 2 for us; it’s the year 3 when things will be put into place.
You need to be real careful about the elections this year. Bush is a Bush by any other name. And I know where George Bush was last new year’s eve; he was at the pyramids. That was made public knowledge. Its’ very interesting why that was made public knowledge. It started the programs again. I can’t watch TV at all without being triggered. I can’t see billboards. I’d love to do scrapbook therapy, but I can’t read magazines. All I can do is just hold my breath , say what I have to say, keep going in my therapy, keep talking to people cause there is hope and we can nail these suckers. We can pull the rug right out from underneath them. I’m being prepared. I was always–we have our eyes opened and we know what we’re doing and we’ll remember that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree and we’ll be OK. But we have to also educate all those people who do not understand.
The first people I talked to about this sort of stuff were in my home church. We have a beautiful church. It doesn’t look like a church, it looks like a building that when you go inside it like “Oh, there’s the church, that guy, and that woman, and there’s that person and that person there.” And the back of it is all glass so as you’re looking out we have these great woods and stuff back there. One day we came to church and they were busily scrubbing stuff off the walls, off the windows. There had been all kinds of graffiti with my name in it put on our church, because that had become a safe place for me. There were people who knew about me. There were people who knew when I switched. There were people that my alters could talk to and they wanted to get rid of that. And it almost worked, but instead I decided that “I think it’s time for a seminar!” So I went. We have two congregations; I invited both congregations, I brought my therapist who is an expert, thank God. I finally got one that I don’t have to train. She was there and a local prosecuting attorney who had won an SRA case was there, so we started off with a little film, a video by– Mike Farrell narrates it, and it talks about the McMartin cases and things like that and moves deeper into SRA. I sat at the back of the room and from the back of people’s heads I could tell that they were glazing, just glazing. So we took a break after the video, of course, and they walked around totally dissociated. And I said, “See, the way you feel right now, like you’re not touching the ground…that’s how I live!” And then, I talked a little bit about myself, some stuff that had happened to me. Some people believed it and some people didn’t. I don’t care. I said it. The next group of people I talked to, this is going to be an ongoing thing now, was a bunch of graduate students at the University of Michigan. There’s a required course you have to take. And it’s for any person graduation no matter what your major. If you have involvement with children, you have to take this course. The last two classes are on ritual abuse. There were ministers there, there were people going into the military from there, there were police officers that were there, there were social workers in there. My therapist and I spent two classes on this. This is amazing that this place is doing this…. two classes on ritual abuse. The last one, the one that my therapist and I went to, that was the last class they had before they graduated. They left awed and scared to death with good reason. And one of them asked, “I am so paranoid!” My therapist said, “Good. You need to be.” So education is going on but we need to start talking.
That’s one of the reasons why I wanted to talk here, because I know that not everybody here is a survivor. We have support people; we have people interested. We want people stopping it. That’s the big thing, right? Stop it. We need to start talking to our elected officials, especially in certain states where a lot of this is going on big time. ” Do you know about this? Are you going to investigate this? Are you going to look at this? Do you want my vote? Do want my friends’ votes? Do you want us to come down and check these things out? Do you want us to bring the press?” Intimidation is good sometimes; I’ve learned from the best. I’m pretty scared actually, I think because of my role in all this.
Some people have talked about the thirteen bloodlines. What I’d like to tell is I now say alleged, even though I have validation to this. It’s still something I want to say alleged. There are three groups of thirteen above these thirteen families. Each of them has a certain role to play. There’s a group above those three, consisting of fifteen people called ‘the Culture’. These people do not act independently. That’s where I’m supposed to be. I’m supposed to be a member of ‘the Culture’; I’m supposed to be one of the fifteen. Guess what? They’re not going to have anybody to break a tie because I’m not going to be there. So don’t be fooled by who’s in power, don’t think the government are the ones doing this. Don’t think the Federal Reserve is part of the government. The Federal Reserve is these thirteen families. That’s some thing we need to tell people about. I thought the Federal Reserve was part of the government for years. It’s called the ‘Federal’ Reserve, for goodness sake. I didn’t realize it was all these people who’d put their money in there and if something’s going to happen to the government, well they’ll bail them out. I don’t want to be bailed out by any of these people. No thank you.
I’ve learned to survive. As a five-year-old, (who is our co-therapist– (she’s brilliant, she has our creativeness stuff), if somebody stuck something in her mouth when she was little, she bit it. She also hates the book Michelle Remembers because she’s going; “I was so bad at the age of five. Why didn’t they kick me out?” But then we prayed for intervention, too, and we didn’t get that. We are now. It’s coming from different ways. It’s not like by ‘grand appearance’ or anything. It’s coming through people, coming through ourselves, coming through people–alters, mega-alters, so many alters saying, “I don’t want to do it anymore. I know the difference. I’ve unravelled enough to say this is not good. Everything you told us was a lie but mixed with the truth.” It makes it ten years for us in therapy. I still feel like I’m beginning, because the unravelling is just so hard. You do see that stuff out there that they tell you you’re gonna see, because it’s part of life. There’s no black and there’s no white, its’ all gray. I was out there trying to find the white and I found the gray and I was so disappointed. It really discouraged me and it took a lot to go back and say, “OK. I need to see gray. I need to know what gray is.” That’s why I’m still doing that ‘normal’ hunting.
Not too long ago, my first cousin was found dead. She was dressed in black; she supposedly shot herself with a deer rifle. She’s about the same size I am, so if you can imagine trying a dear rifle in your mouth, pull the trigger and be all dressed in black. Good luck… That was a big sign, that was a big trigger, because we were so close. They were doing a lot of the same things that we did…one of those shut-up things. Well, we don’t like to shut up. Obviously they’re getting pretty close to me when it appears that I’m not done. And I’m a little worried about going home; I’m a little worried about repercussions. They do like to occasionally pick me up and remind me of things. And I’m OK with that as long as I come back. I have plenty of people who know names and places, so if anything does happen to me they know where to look. I’ve got all of you now; you’ve just become part of my safety system. My grandmom’s dying right now; she was my only safe person. She’s 98 years old, God bless her. I can’t go to her funeral cause too many of my family will be there in one place. I don’t dare because I know I won’t come back. We’ve always had that psychic connection, my grandmother and I. I wanted to tell her things that I knew my mother would never tell her. Like “your mom is waiting for you.” So she talked to my mom’s step-husband not too long ago and she said, “I want you to tell Gigi some things.” She told me as she murmured, she (her mama) is smiling, she has me reach my hand out and she’s there. She knew I wanted to tell her that, so it’s kind of in her memory, because right now, that’s all she means to me, I couldn’t talk to her and she’s a memory. Her cancer is really bad, so she’s a memory, the best memory I have. She gave me a gift of music, and I use that music. I turned my back on ‘them’ too. They can send me tapes, they can call on the phone with layers of music, they can call with tones, they can call with clicks, they can call with whatever they want. My music is different and every person I teach is carrying on that same song.
So I’d warn anybody, saying, “Please, please, be careful. Be awake. Take the risk to start educating people.” I don’t want to sound like a doomsday person, but time’s getting close. Those hourglasses inside are running out. We do need to protect ourselves, and sometimes it may be from our own government and our own family, from our neighbors, from our own church. They don’t take anything as sacred; they desecrate everything; they pervert everything. So, please, during therapy, have alters ask about this stuff, because they’ll tell you. I think they’re all scared, and if any of yours are like mine, these big old pompous ones are little tiny kids that are scared to death.
And so I’m going to end with that, on a real up-beat note. I have one more thing to say, and I’ll just leave you with this. My little five-year old yesterday was hearing somebody talk about denial, and I had to tell a little joke for her, I don’t want her coming out, although she’s pushing really hard. But she wanted you to know that we have a passport to Egypt. We go to ‘de nile’ all the time.
So take care and thank you very much for being here, listening, and I’d be happy to answer any questions I might be able to. Thank you so much.